I have never been a morning person. I was drug out of bed when I was little to be thrown into freezing cold water by 7am in the summer for swim team practice. I was drug out of bed during the school year extra early because I had to be out the door walking to the bus by 6:30am. In high school I did stupid things like sign up for early bird gym and do two sports in one season. In college it seemed I always had at least one 8am class, or a job that started at 6am. Then I had a few years reprieve, where I had a normal job, I could be to work by 9am and sleep till noon on the weekends. But by then, I had discovered the elixir of life, wine of the gods, go-juice!
I used to hate coffee. It was bitter, and disgusting, and I was stupid! I tried to be adult and drink it on several occasions, but the cup was always left mostly full. And then I met Dunkin Donuts!
The very first day we were in New Bedford, MA, we noticed the D&D stores, billboards, tv ads, and styrofoam coffee mug in every person's hand. There is no greater marketing campaign than that of D&D on the east coast. Because those people, as one of their adverts claims, "run on Dunkin". And its true! The pace of life is so much faster that 6 years later when we moved back to Iowa, the slow, friendly, chatty pace of store clerks and service workers almost caused me to go postal. COMEONPEOPLE!!! I got places to go and people to see! People out there start their day at 9 and end it at 3, but still accomplish as much as here, where we start work at 8 and end at 5.
Our first experience with "OUR" D&D was a lesson in east coast etiquette. The long line at 9am zipped through, and suddenly we found ourselves face to face with a Stephanie Plum-esk Jersey girl, complete with big hair, silver hoops the size of hub caps, and an accent that let me know I would be "taken care of", if you know what I mean. "What can I getcha, hon?", not said sweetly, but as if we were wasting the most precious of times. To which we replied, "um... well... I'm not really sure...how about...", and suddenly, she screams, "NEXT!!!" and we were efficiently jostled out of the way.
We learned how to order. A regular hot medium means 2 creams, 2 sugars, not black coffee. If you say you want a coffee, with 2 creams and 2 sugars, they look at you like you have something wrong with you. Its all about efficiency. What do you want, hot or cold, what goes in it, what size, and make it snappy. Our D&D girls eventually saw us coming in line and knew what to make us, and knew that if we were alone, we should never leave that store without a coffee for our better half, or it could mean our marriage.
But the most important thing to understand about D&D was that the coffee they make in the store has crack in it. I'm not kidding. They sprinkle it in with the sugar. I know this because I realized one day that I was addicted. I caught myself saying "I like the way I feel on it." That's not something one usually says about coffee, is it? That's something you say when you're trying to get off the hard core stuff. I was so addicted. I still jones for it!
So now, before I can think or do, I must have my coffee. It's not my D&D coffee, made by my girls, just Folgers made with too many grinds brewed on strong. But it gets me moving! So thanks, D&D, for the mornings. I will never get over you!
D Combinatorics
2 days ago
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