Thursday, April 2, 2009

Moms

I had a wonderful time on my trip out to Boston and New Bedford. I got to smell a new baby head, visit loved friends, and help a new mommy out. Which is the reason I went, because after I was inducted into the mommy sorority, I had tons of help to do all the non-baby stuff. I was eternally grateful for the food, laundry, company, advice, dishes and shoulders to cry on or hand my babies off to. And what better way to repay that than to be there for another new inductee!

Upon reflection of this journey I was thinking of all the mums I had the pleasure of keeping company. First, the new mommy. How surreal was it to be sitting with one of my oldest and best friends while she held her brand new baby, and I held (or restrained, man handled and wrangled) my 2nd baby? Completely aware that unsolicited advice is annoying to new moms, I tried to restrain myself, but couldn't help it sometimes. I hope she will take what she wanted and ignore what she didn't. Watching her reminded me so much of when my babies were that little, and made me sad, proud, envious and relieved all at the same time. T will be a very good mommy. The love she has for her baby is very evident in the way she plays with and smiles at him, holds him and gazes at him. He will be loved!

I had the chance to visit with a soon to be mommy. She looked really good... you know, the type of good where she is only showing in the cute, tiny, miniature basketball sort of way with a definite pink glow to her skin and no signs of sleeplessness, unease or vomit on her. I'm so happy for her, but I hate her at the same time. And people like me say, "well, she'll have it easy now, but then the baby will come out! Ha!" I know, I'm evil, but I was "all day" sick for 5 months, swelled like Violet Beauregaurd in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory, and was generally miserable... it's a damn good thing I think my kids are cute! I think Emily panicked these soon to be parents as she ping ponged around their living room from one life threatening hazard to the next. First the outlet, then the giant ladder like bookshelf not screwed to the wall with tiny choking hazards and breakables perched on its ledges, to the drawing charcoal and oils set up for painting, to the obscenely pointed coffee table, to the coat hanger with long thin scarfs set to either topple or become a noose... 9 months will be here before you can blink, I told them, but it's fun, and you will have time. It will change your life, but it will give you a life you will never want to give back! The joy of parenting far out ways the worry, stress, sleeplessness, and pain. That's why we have more! I can't wait to share that joy with them! This baby is also very lucky to be born to their family.

I visited with a new grandma. My good friend and co-worker from last year now has a grandbaby, and she has such an easy handed way of loving him. I did not get to sniff his head, much to my disappointment, but I was able to take her to coffee and grill her for information. I asked her how she delt with her daughter doing things in ways that she did not do, and how she gave advice. Very wisely she said she gently offers it by saying, "This is how I used to do it that worked." and bowing out when her daughter says, "The pediatrician says to do this." I greatly admire her and hope that she sucks all the joy she can from her grandbaby!

And then there's the experienced Super Mom, Carrie. PTO and town council leading, fund and hell raising, cupcake assembling, kid chauffeuring, supper making, Martha loving, curtain changing, man eating, goal achieving, I AM WOMAN roaring, friend extraordinaire! She juggles all this and more with three children (because, come on, husbands are sometimes like another toddler)! I loved sitting with tea or wine and comparing notes, sharing plans, hopes and dreams, and learning from her. And again I think to myself, her children are so lucky to have her, and any child that blesses their life will be loved. And that is as good a reason to have another, sweet pea, because you guys make and raise great babies!

To all moms; for the things you do that go unrecognized, great and small, that lead to the raising of spectacular kids, that spreads love in the world and makes it a better place, may you find happiness, peace and God's blessings in your accomplishments as the human race's core and foundation!

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